The Bowdoin Orient

The first time I watched porn was with one of my girlfriends, to whom I've always gone for sex advice. When I told her last year that I had never seen a porno before, she was shocked. Eager to expose my "innocent" mind to the world of X-rated images and videos, she grabbed her boyfriend's laptop and opened up his porn folder. Seconds later we were sitting on the couch, watching Jenna Lewis from TV's Survivor having sex with some anonymous guy.

Sex makes most people feel pretty good. Plain and simple, it's one of the more amazing things our bodies are capable of doing. In a perfect world, you would only get pregnant when you wanted to, and there would be no such thing as STDs. But if you're careless and don't plan ahead, there can be a dark side to sex.

One of the things they forget to mention on your pre-college tour of Bowdoin is that once you've accepted your admission, you can say goodbye to the "private" part of your life. Don't start writing your letter to the editor just yet. Before I divulge, I want to clarify that I am not out to defame Bowdoin or its ability to allow students a private life. But after talking with Bowdoin students at length about this situation, I was amazed at how much people have to say about it.

Open relationships. When I asked my mom if they were around when she was in college in the 70s, she answered, "You mean promiscuity?" That's one way of putting it.

People come to college with varying degrees of sexual experience. Some of us have lots of it, while others arrive never having even kissed someone. Regardless of where you stood upon arrival your first year, you knew after the first few weeks of school which of your close friends were virgins and which weren't. Somehow there was an invisible line that separated the ones who'd had sex and the ones who hadn't.

Tick tock. Time is running out for graduating seniors and we're all thinking (consciously or not) about the same thing: What's going to happen to our relationships, or lack thereof, in these last few months of college? Senior spring can be exhilarating or it can be just the opposite?sort of like sex. Graduating seniors are looking for their first jobs and ways out of their parents' houses, while at the same time facing up to the inescapable romantic deadline that graduation

I want to know what happened to dating at Bowdoin. Where did it go? I know you've probably heard this gripe before, but I'm serious. We need to bring dating back to Bowdoin.

Getting dumped is bad. Getting dumped for someone else? That's even worse. Here are the two most common kinds of breakups: the "we just can't get along" one, and the "there's someone else" one. Which is better? I think we would all prefer the former.

I love you. The closest I've come to hearing these words from a guy was a lame attempt to get in my pants with the classic "I want to love you." He didn't want to love me; he wanted to sleep with me. Nice try.

There are hundreds of sex myths out there. Think: virgins can't get pregnant the first time they have sex, bigger is better, girls are more needy than guys?the list is never- ending. My favorite myth is that women are always looking for love, while men just want sex. In other words, women want to be in a relationship, and men want no strings attached.

It's Parents Weekend, and students are introducing their new boyfriends and girlfriends to Mom and Dad. Instead of writing about the awkward, anxiety-provoking mess that often ensues on this weekend, I thought I would dig in to how our parents?yes, our parents?shape our romantic relationships.

As I walked out of the library last Monday night on my way to Kresge Auditorium, I heard a familiar voice behind me. "Lauren McGrath!" she shouted. "Are you going where I think you're going?" "Oh yeah." I replied. I was going to the female orgasm. With a laugh, she replied, "Yeah, me too."

It's the question on everyone's mind: What's your number? No, not what's your phone number, but how many people have you slept with?

PDA. I'll translate for those of you who don't get out much: Public Display of Affection. You've seen outbreaks of it at Bowdoin, or back home, but this summer and fall I became an expert on the subject, or should I say affliction? I tracked it down all over New York City for Seventeen Magazine, and now I'm surrounded by it in Paris. And let me tell you, it's getting a little bit out of control.

DTR. When I asked my guy friends if they knew what this acronym meant, one answered with confidence, "It's bug repellant," while another responded knowingly, "Oh yeah, that's that new birth control pill." No boys, DTR stands for those three little words you dread hearing most?"Define The Relationship."

He can't get involved with anyone until he knows what his life is about...God, he's so complicated. Sound familiar? Maybe you've heard it, or something like it, from that guy you think you want to date. What do Greg Behrendt and Liz Tuccillo, former writers for Sex and The City, think about his excuses? Their response is summed up in the title of their best-selling debut book He's Just Not That Into You.

The thought of Parents Weekend has been looming over my head for weeks. Here's a preview of what introductions are going to be like for me: I'll turn to my roommates and say, "I'd like you to meet my family. This is my mom, my dad, my step-mom, my step-dad, my brother, my half-brother, and my half-sister." Your family might take even longer.