Cline McConnell

*This is a spoiler-free review except for one little spoiler that is revealed not even 20 minutes into the movie, which is impossible to review the movie without, so grow up and deal with the one spoiler. Honestly, the movie’s been out for two weeks—I’m not taking slack because you haven’t gotten around to seeing it yet.*

Yes. There is a difference. That’s a dumb headline. I just really want you to read this column, and I thought that would hook you. A better headline would be: “Amazing, awful and everything in between.” Shoot, now I wish that were the headline. But we can’t change what we’ve already done. And thus, we get to the crux of “Digger,” directed by multiple Oscar-winning director Alejandro González Iñárritu and starring unknown boy-next-door Tom Cruise. The film follows oil tycoon Digger Rockwell, who faces a troubling dilemma: An explosion at his oil field in Greenland sent a massive ice chunk into the Atlantic Ocean, headed to destroy Northern Europe. Digger can’t undo what’s already done. Similarly, the film can’t undo what it does. Merely 20 minutes in, the movie reveals itself to be a metanarrative play-within-a-movie. Stay with me now. If you’re getting confused, trust me, I was too. The Digger ice disaster is the subject of the play, ‘Fossil Fools,’ a cult classic in the movie’s dystopian future. It’s a truly fascinating choice, and likely the reason the film has been widely divisive. Some say it’s awful. Some say it’s amazing. Some people without spines refuse to give an opinion. I say … there’s validity to all sides, and I will attempt to explore them all before finally giving an opinion:

Amazing: Man, Tom Cruise just rocks. He’s throwing 99 on the corner for almost every second of this movie. Digger Rockwell is a horrible human being. After watching Cruise’s performance, I wanted nothing more than to spend more time with Digger Rockwell. Sure, the role may be a tad overacted, but it’s Digger %#$^$&% Rockwell; it better be overacted. Even if you don’t see this movie, look up his monologue scene on Youtube.

Awful: I really hate to say it, but I didn’t like the meta-theater choice. Or at least not the way it was done. Sure, maybe it added some cool nuance and harsh realism to the 21st century Dr. Strangelove-style satire movie about climate change, but maybe I liked that premise to begin with. And if you’re going to pull the rug out from under the audience to make these grander points about who’s funding art, about whether we can really handle art pieces dealing with climate change, about Big Brother surveillance and about whether art helps us cope with or ignore reality, then you better do it well. Iñárritu set out to tackle at least five questions too many, and I was left not fully caring about any of them.

In Between: John Goodman looked like a muppet—specifically, Beaker.

Amazing: Although I think Iñárritu took a tiny bit too big of a swing, I won’t deny the outstanding writing. Every line captivates. If for nothing else, go watch Digger just to watch ‘Fossil Fools’ because it’s powerful and hilarious. For most of the movie, the quick, witty banter has you grinning ear to ear, and then a line like, “They know the facts. The story has yet to be told,” hits you deep down.

Awful: This movie has a Fortnite collab.

In Between: Digger’s voice is a perfect cross between Joe Biden, Matthew McConaughey and Tom Cruise, with a splash of Forrest Gump.

Amazing: The ending is incredible. For all my criticisms, this movie unbelievably lands the plane. The plane may have been on fire, but it got to the ground nonetheless.

Awful: Nobody is falling for that Jesse Plemons wig. When he got overly emotional in his monologue, I genuinely thought it was going to fall off.

In Between: Is the world ready for a film about climate change? I don’t even know if I am. I caught myself tuning out whenever the film leaned too hard into nihilistic climate stuff. In my life, I can only think of two major box-office films that directly address the issue, “Wall-E” and “Interstellar,” and I only still remember those two films for other reasons.

Amazing: There was a moment in this movie where I thought the Cruisical (Tom Cruise musical) was coming. For that split second of serendipity, I was ready to call this film the greatest ever made.

Awful: Never again do I want to see a thermometer go into the wrong end of a cat. I almost threw up.

In Between: After reviewing “Primetime” and now “Digger” back to back, my friend suggested I watch “Airbud” next for a change of pace. I think I might take him up on that.

So which is it, Whittier, amazing, awful or in between?

*Drumroll, please.*

Pretty good!

Although I didn’t love it, I’m sure subsequent rewatches will only make this movie better and better. I wouldn’t be surprised if in just five years, we look back and go, ‘Man, how did people not like Digger?’

8.1/10. “Bang bang bang.”