How many times have you heard or complained about women being more attached to men? We often think of men as detached from their emotions and enjoying "playing the field." Women, on the other hand, are seen as hopelessly romantic and most content settling down with one man to pursue a serious relationship. That's what we've been told or what we commonly think, but are men and women really so different? Are men really from Mars and women from Venus?
Results from the Spring 2005 Bowdoin Student Life Survey conducted by the Gender and Women's Studies class Research and Social Change may shock you. Though students at Bowdoin have certain stereotypes about men and women and their views on monogamy, commitment, and love, these set ideas may just be socially constructed. In examining the survey results, we find that of men and women not in relationships at Bowdoin, 66 percent of men and 61 percent of women want to be in relationship. Statistically, there is virtually no difference between each sex's desires for commitment.
But you may counter, maybe these groups are lonely and this is why they desire a relationship. However, in examining men and women who are currently in relationships at Bowdoin, the same percentage of men (46 percent) and women (45 percent) presently have a significant other. Some might argue that these relationships are transient and are unable to disprove traditional thought. However, when evaluating these same students in serious relationships, defined as over six months, once again there is no statistical difference between the percent of men (23 percent) and women (26 percent) on campus willing to commit to another Bowdoin student.
What does this all mean? Perhaps next time you and your friends complain about men and women desiring different things from the opposite sex, think about these statistics. Clearly men and women at Bowdoin both value committed relationships whether they are currently experiencing or hoping for one. So for all you ladies out there, there's a good chance that the guy you're crushing on in Econ class is more willing than you think to take the next step. And for all you men enslaved by the commitment-phobia discourse, just be aware that men among you feel the same way and are not as afraid of relationships as popular culture would like you to think.