The unnamed dad in the Calvin and Hobbes comic series had a popular refrain. Whenever Calvin complained about something (usually a father-son bonding activity) his dad always responded with a because-I-said-so reason, followed by, “Besides, it builds character.” The importance of these character-building moments in our lives should not be understated.
As long as I can remember my family motto has been “suck it up.” I have come to realize that through their mildly ostensible harshness, my parents were trying to do me a favor. Not only do excruciating experiences—such as airport hang overs on international flights—make someone a more versed and interesting individual, they also contribute to the stock of mental discipline.
Before proceeding, I think it is wise to actually define ‘mental discipline.’ I see it as the ability to muster the willingness to do something that is undesirable, but ultimately necessary or beneficial. Ending a Netflix binge and getting back to work, resisting a third helping of pie at Bowdoin’s Thanksgiving dinner, and showing up to class on Friday morning (shudder) all in some way require varying degrees of mental toughness.
Malcolm Gladwell’s famous and overly cited 10,000 hours rule speaks to the mental discipline of all highly successful people. Gladwell’s theory refers to the minimum amount of time spent practicing a skill before one can become truly elite. A good deal of those hours are always dedicated to the mind-numbing, endless repetition that builds perfection.
Do you think Tiger Woods really wanted to practice his approach shot until the sun went down? That Bobby Fischer enjoyed sitting at a chessboard thinking of the endless possible moves whilst only playing against himself? That a young Bill Gates felt rested and relaxed building his company with a scheme of “36 hours on, 10 off?” That Joey Chestnut had a genuine passion for chugging gallons of water to stretch his stomach for eating a world record 69 hotdogs and buns in ten minutes, earning a 7th consecutive national title? The answer to all these questions is a resounding no. Although most successful people possess some degree of natural talent, they utilize and unlock their gifts by forcing themselves to do what others are not willing to do.
Mental discipline counters the tendency of each one of us to discount time: we tend to value immediate gratification more than a greater benefit in the future. It is difficult to get up with the first alarm when we know that our 8:30 a.m. class does not technically require a shower beforehand. Surely seven more minutes in bed are preferable to what your lab partner will identify as a subtle body odor of late night Domino’s. A more fortified mental constitution allows us to overcome our innate myopia and act in such a way that benefits us best in the long term.
What are some strategies to foster iron will and resolve? I do not claim to be an exceptionally self-disciplined or mentally tough person. I feel, however, the only way to build these traits is by consistently forcing yourself to do things at which you are no good. Do something you hate, simply because you are bad at it and want to be better.
Do you like conceptual physics but cannot understand the math? You’d best get moving on the extra practice problems. Socially anxious? Strike up a conversation with five new people everyday. Your weak skills will improve and your stock of mental discipline will increase. When the need arises, you will be able to draw upon this reserve to push yourself in ways that were previously unimaginable.
Returning to “character building”—there are times when there is no reason to do something other than for the sake of strengthening your mental resolve. Little activities like waking up early, operating on little sleep, finishing work well before it is due, purposefully being a bit too cold or otherwise uncomfortable all add up to a more resilient, driven individual who exhibits outstanding self control. I do not advocate for these sorts of “tests” all the time, but they are a rather easy way to cultivate mental discipline capital.
Occasionally, extreme experiences are the only panacea. Sometimes it takes a Navy SEAL-inspired 4 a.m. rise and shine, complete with a cold-water hose down and a nice two-mile crawl through the mud while facing jarring personal insults, to really know one’s mental breaking point.