Appreciating cheap beer

Beer Fever with Weaver: A bit of Maine in the fridge

Andrew's English Pale Ale?$7.95 for a six-pack at Uncle Tom's Market On mornings when I awake to that familiar glare of blinding snow through the window shades and the sound of snowplows backing down for another go at the street outside, I am often struck by the perpetual and unrelenting constancy of nature. No matter what we do, or don't do, nature is always doing something around us. Though many of you are cursing every innocent snowflake that hits the ground, bear in mind that with driving winds and 12 inches of snow come some unmistakable advantages as well. Now we all know this is leading to beer one way or another, so why don't I cut to the chase and offer the punch line (before I digress into the many benefits of schooling in a wintry wonderland): We all knew that a whopper of a snowstorm was coming eventually, so now that it's here, I find it fitting to offer Andrew's English Pale Ale, a beer brewed exclusively in Maine, because it is important to remember while trudging to class that there's a far more pleasant and tasty piece of Maine waiting for you back in your fridge.

Beer Fever with Weaver: Alex Weaver's cures for beer fever

Beer Fever has the flu. Now, I'm not talking a runny nose and a little muscle ache here. This is the kind of flu where I'm dripping sweat walking through a snowstorm in a T-shirt and absolutely freezing on the third floor of the library.

Beer Fever with Weaver

This piece represents the opinion of the author:

Alex Weaver

Columnist

February 23, 2007

"Unclassy" Beer?Sold cheap. Everywhere.

Ever since blindly stumbling upon the "Beer Fever with Weaver" crown at the beginning of the year, my life has changed in a number of significant ways: some good, some not so much. To begin?though admittedly flattering?it is a little hard to get my beauty sleep while throngs of autograph-seeking high school girls camp outside my room at night and take turns reciting their names with "Weaver" longingly attached to the end. Similarly annoying, around campus it seems that my name is slowly morphing into simply "Beer Fever"?as opposed to "Weaver" or (gasp!) "Alex."

While I revel in my newfound title and the unending glory it has afforded me, I have found that with my God-given gift of oratory have come some heightened expectations of my daily life as well. For example, "E! True Hollywood Story" contacted me about running a piece on my recent ascension to the spotlight (though I heard a disappointed sigh after replying in the negative when asked about any serious drug or alcohol problems). But what has surprised me most is the phenomenon I am confronted with at nearly every party (or Bowdoin-Colby hockey game) I attend. Whether by the keg, on the dance floor, or in the stands, some wiseguy always obnoxiously yells, to the chiding of his cronies: "Hey Beer Fever! What do you have to say about this PBR?" Well, for this guy's sake and everyone else's, consider this your lucky day. Welcome to "Unclassy Beer 101." Take good notes; the quiz is this weekend.

Senior year has afforded me an interesting perspective on the drinking scene here at Bowdoin. I remember fondly back in my youth, when Halloween rolled around and everyone got so excited about the chance to dress and act as someone or something else. Similarly, I smile to think back on recess in preschool, when I, as Batman, would swing heroically on the monkey bars as Ted, being Robin, would hum the theme song from below. Yet today, as I mourn the loss of such childish games of masquerade, I can't help but realize that such fantasies haven't really ceased. No, in fact, many of us partake in such games at least once (or four times) each week: it's called going to the bar. Think about it: every Tuesday night, we all tell ourselves that we've had a hard week and that a nice cold beer is just what we need to fight through the next two days. Let's be honest with ourselves here: other than the annoying wait for the Safe Ride, the $15 tab, and really bad popcorn, what is the difference between that Newcastle or Gin and Tonic and the month-old MGD sitting in your fridge? Lesson No. 1 (really the only point of this article): Not a damn thing.

Now, let me be a little more specific here. I happen to think that Newcastle is in the running for the best beer ever made, but I still find it somewhat amusing that after a three-day weekend, two weekdays, and three classes, I saunter up to the bar, order up a Newcastle, and flush my worries away with that first glorious sip (all the while telling myself that I've really "earned" it). Next year, perhaps, as many of us are bustling our way around a big city with a job, apartment, and metro pass, this scene will become not only fitting, but also completely justifiable. But for all us college students?even those of you with jobs?I think it's important to embrace everything that a 30-rack of Natty Light has to offer, and to realize that there is nothing wrong with ordering the $1 PBR while the Sam Adams sits directly adjacent (a venture many of you are aware of). Here, let me indulge you.

Just the other week, I attended a friend's party. Everyone was laughing, dancing, having a great time until, sure enough, that familiar yell echoed out across the room: "Hey Beer Fever! What are your thoughts about this Bud Light?" As always, I bit my tongue and said some B.S. comment about how the hops and fruity aroma really accentuate the light and fulfilling taste. In retrospect, I wish I had taken a second to get my major point across. As college students, we need to embrace the time when buying 30 cans of cheap beer is not only acceptable, but downright practical. All too often, people scoff at the so-called "unclassy" beer and instead opt for that 6-pack of Honey Brown for $4.99?as if that's any better.

In the end, I think it is important to realize that cheap beer is an influential part of the Bowdoin experience. With our tuition tipping the scales at well over $40,000, our books consistently coming in at several hundred dollars each semester, and the C-Store charging a ludicrous 30 cents for those delectable Cheetos Cheese and Crackers, why spend more on beer than is really necessary? After all, when it comes right down to it, everyone loves a good Natty Light. Not only do they taste great and achieve the same end as that Allagash White, but they also fulfill a mandatory requirement for being a college kid: cheap fun. So, let people scoff all they want. Because when it comes to class, don't we sit through enough of that already?

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