Ethan Lam

Returning to the College from abroad and seeing the excitement from the incoming first years has us—to put it in Adler-ic terms—stoked to party. But all we’ve known at the College is a social scene that people complain about.

We’re hoping to unpack over the next five columns why that is and give our two cents on how to throw down in Brunswick. Below is an excerpt from a larger conversation on the party scene. Enjoy!

BA: Do themes matter that much?

MG: Good themes can encourage people to come to and loosen up at a party. If they have the costume on, they’re probably not going to leave after five minutes. That being said, not every party has to be themed. Some of what the College suffers from is that there aren’t enough parties that are just for the sake of partying. What do you make of that?

BA: Broadly, you need to subscribe to the rules of that party, whatever they may be. If you’re gonna throw a party where the theme is “Anything but Clothes,” you need everyone to show up wearing anything but clothes. Otherwise, there’s no energy.

MG: So, maybe as hosts, we can be more clear about what we want our functions to be and ask people to buy in. Once people are at the party though, music is an important consideration. What are musical priorities for you, for live music and for Auxing?

BA: Live music is exciting. A significant chunk of all the student bands that I’ve seen have involved an audience who are down and excited to see their friends play on stage, which generates a lot of flexibility with the songs. It’s hype to see people from class, the quad and the dining hall performing.

MG: Agreed.

BA: Auxing is hard. A lot of people are not down to listen to music they’ve never heard. It’s a skill to be able to dance to and enjoy a song, even if you don’t know the lyrics. I get embarrassed when all my friends seem to know an album or artist I’ve never heard of. But it’s also epic because it exposed me to all this cool music. I often find myself wishing that more people were just down to hear music that’s not 2000s hits and just see what that’s like.

MG: Part of the College House experience is that everybody is insecure about throwing a well-attended party. Everyone complains that the music is always bad at parties, but then their mind switches when it’s time to host, and they think, “Oh, well, if people are going to like this party, we need to play the music they like.” But in reality, shouldn’t the reason you throw a party be to have fun with your friends? Especially at a school this small where you’re rarely going to meet new people. You should play the music you want to dance to. If that’s 2010’s pop, then I salute you. But, at least with everyone I talk to, that’s not the case.

BA: Sometimes, people are a little afraid to bust it down.

MG: There’s a huge difference between the type of dancing in a College House basement and an upperclassman party. Whereas the upperclassmen parties’ spaces are so small there’s not enough room to dance, the College House experience feels more like it’s geared to set up hookups than it is to set up dancing. And why dance? Your goal is to be perceived. So people dance in a way that is inoffensive. In my opinion, though, the goal should be fun.

BA: It’s hard to have the time to party at the College. People have so much shit to do. It takes effort to party. Maybe it’s wrong to assume, but I do think partying requires a certain activation. It requires discipline.

MG: Agreed. Ultimately, a successful party requires a commitment to the concept of whatever you’d like the night to be. There’s no going back after you decide to go to Supers. Your only other option is to go home. Likewise, if you’re wearing clothes to go to a kickback, you’re not going to suddenly want to go to Bax basement. Personally, I’m not trying to dance in my Birkenstocks. You have to be disciplined with the attitude that you put forth into the night, to hold yourself and others accountable to have fun. Because ultimately, having a good time is a choice.