1 … 2 … 3 … CANCUN

Following its victory against the Bowdoin H*rpoon, Southern Charm, everyone’s favorite intramural basketball team, sadly saw its season come to a close at the hands of Beaters of Balls. Southern Charm started off hot with a 7-1 run after just five minutes of play thanks to some deep threes from Andrew Cohen ’24. However, the Beaters of Balls quickly hit back when Andrew Boel ’24 and Colton Fahey ’24 caught fire from beyond the arc and took a 13-11 lead at halftime. Unfortunately for Southern Charm, the second half was not as close. Whereas Sam Pausman ’24 kept roommate Mike Randall ’24 as quiet as Kevin Durant in Game 3, Southern Charm’s inability to get stops and Pausman’s own inability to take smart shots ended up costing the team the game. The team will reconvene in a year’s time but will be load managing for the upcoming eleven months.

RE-LAX AND TAKE NOTES

The women’s lacrosse team bested Connecticut College 19-5 in a lopsided NESCAC showdown this past Saturday. Led by a high-powered offense and a staunch defense, the 16th-ranked Polar Bears improved to a 9-6 record (4-6 NESCAC) and are currently sitting at sixth in the NESCAC standings. Fiona Bundy ’22 was especially impressive, as her goal tally of five matched the entirety of the Conn. College roster. In addition to the goals, Bundy added two more assists, second only to Colleen McAlloon’s three-assist game. When the final whistle was blown, nine different Polar Bears had found the net. Following a loss to Tufts University on Wednesday, the women’s lacrosse team will kick off their postseason this weekend.

BEER ME

Over the weekend, Noah Eckstein ’21 performed one of the most daunting tasks any athlete could comprehend: the dreaded ‘beer mile.’ The rules are simple: down a beer, run a lap, repeat four times. For many, this task seems impossible. For Eckstein, it was baby food. Eckstein not only boasted an impressive time of 6:41, but his running shorts were the shortest of the day by a long (short?) shot. Eckstein was the first to acknowledge that the fourth lap was difficult, but with more people attending his beer mile attempt than the BSG debate, he was left with no choice but to succeed.