Three girls walk into a bar. They look around, surveying the territory when their eyes fall upon two other young women. These other ladies are wearing short dresses, five-inch pumps and a lot of makeup. “They’re such sluts,” the three girls whisper spitefully. “Put some clothes on.”

Before you roll your eyes at what has become the Feminism 101 cliché of “slut-shaming,” I want to look into what these circumstances actually suggest. Firstly, the notion of “slut-shaming” is troublingly unspecific. Are we chastising women for the actual act of sleeping with multiple partners, or for dressing like they want to be doing so? This is, of course, not to label all women mean-spirited, but to expose clothes-shaming, or the “Crop Top Effect” (patent pending), as an issue that merits equal attention.

While I want to focus on girls’ critiques of each other, I do think it’s relevant to examine some instances of clothing-shaming that have recently come to light but are in no way new phenomena. For years and years, schools have instilled strict dress codes stating that women are forbidden from wearing items like tank-tops, shirts that show their bra straps, or short skirts. I do think these early instances of clothing-shaming contribute to the way we judge women later in life.

All that should matter in a school is that students come to class ready to learn. And sure, dressing respectfully can be important in instances such as say, interviewing for a job. The reasoning behind school dress codes is that classrooms deserve an equal level of professionalism and respect. Makes sense. But what exactly does “appropriate” or “respectful” mean? 

What if a student came to school wearing a gigantic M&M costume? That’s not exactly professional, but if her bra isn’t showing, is it considered permissible? The real question is, why are the majority of these rules so quick to police the female body? Why is it so quickly assumed that someone’s wardrobe choices are intentionally sexually provocative rather than merely comfortable or convenient?  

When younger girls are sent home for wearing their skirts too short, or wearing a “skimpy” top, this only teaches girls to be ashamed of their bodies. It also dangerously implies that their education is in some way subordinate to their appearance.

Now, why are girls so hard on each other? One argument is that girls feel competitive with one another for male attention, and thus feel threatened when other women dress to impress men. 

People generally tend to make “thinking errors” in these types of situations. A “thinking error” means that we tend to invent reasons for other people’s behaviors that often have no basis in reality, but are instead the projected products of our own insecurities or beliefs. 

So, we might think, “this girl wore that sexy outfit to purposefully undermine me and my subtle beauty” instead of, “that girl looks great in those pants and I am not going to assume that the reason she wore those clothes has anything to do with my personal reaction to her!” 

Obviously I’m being a bit facetious here, but I’m sincere in my overall belief that clothing is often an unfair standard by which to judge other women. If we are to assume a girl is dressing to make it “easier” for men to see she is interested in having sex, this has serious consequences. This kind of thinking is deeply problematic, and I don’t think it would be too far of a stretch to say that it falls directly in line with the “she was asking for it” paradigm. It is just not our job to ascribe motives to another person’s way of presenting themselves to the world. To do this is presumptuous and unfair.  When will a girl’s body just be able to be her own?

What would be better than covering women up would be providing them with educational opportunities, sex education, media literacy, and the ability to make informed choices about their own bodies. And yes, the way we dress can make a statement about who we are or how we feel, but it doesn’t necessarily. To assume that it does is, at best, catty, and at worst, hazardous. We have power in setting the standards, and we can do better.