So it's been a while since the last Kolumnalu, and a lot of stuff has gone down. Spring played a cruel joke on us for a few weeks, we got to go home for a bit, and most important, I learned the cruel lesson that, contrary to popular belief, eating and sleeping for two weeks will not lead to incredible gains in muscle mass.
Which means that I've been forced to return to the gym, and its horrible choice of pump-up music. How can I be expected to pump five-pound weights with Enya as my soundtrack?
But all this really doesn't matter. What matters is that in the past few weeks I discovered a new sport.
A sport that I've heard so much about but never seen: lacrosse—more specifically women's lacrosse. It all happened a few weeks back on March 30.
My girl Jordan Smith '14, a proud representative of the Dirty Jersey, which we'll call her from here on, had persuaded a few of our floormates and me to get down to watch the team take on the University of Southern Maine (USM).
To be honest, I didn't really want to go—I had a lot of procrastination to take care of—and I'd heard that men's lacrosse was more enjoyable. But Dirty Jersey just didn't give up, and I agreed to head over for the first half. Even though I didn't get to see my girl take the field, the game was awesome.
Before the game, lacrosse, for me, meant insane flow, Crack House, and Brantford Winstonworth. But now, I realize it's actually pretty fun to watch.
First off, we're really good, which always helps. Yes, playing USM is not the best way to evaluate a team's talent, but still we scored 12 goals in a couple of minutes, which must be tough.
By "a couple" I mean 30, but that shouldn't take away from my argument. Every time we went down the field, it was a goal.
And then there's the pace of the game as a whole. It's just so damn fast, like someone pressed fast forward for the whole game. Every run seemed like a sprint. Our girls were just jetting from one end of the field to the other, and the defensemen/defenders (let's be honest, I have no idea what they're called) seemed to have no way to stop them.
So every time we had possession, we'd just juke and jerk our way around towards the opposing goal. Sadly, I had to leave at half, so I missed Dirty Jersey take the field in the second half, and score two (I've heard) absolutely insane goals.
Now, even though I'm feeling the sport, I have a few suggestions to make.
First off, I didn't really see any celebrations after each goal, and I feel that could improve. Dirty Jersey even suggested that it would be cool if the sport went the soccer route, shirts off after every goal and jump into the crowd, but I think that's a bit too racy, nah mean? And when I said a few suggestions, I actually meant just one.